The End
by djinni14
Summary: Everything comes to an end. Some endings are simple and you can see them coming. Others are a slap in the face that you didn't see coming. But what if the end is of your own creation? A mistake that you can't fix, no matter how hard you want to. - COMPLETE


**The End**

Rick wanted to have a future with Kate and it was way past time to lay his cards on the table, even if he was sure that Kate would likely run, but at least he was making a choice.

Except it all went south in a heartbeat. "This is my life Castle not yours, mine!"

Rick had walked out with a. "Have a nice life Beckett, we're done."

Rick had just come home from Alexis's graduation speech. He had never been more proud of her in his life. His little girl was growing up into an amazing young woman.

"Go have fun with your friends Alexis, this is your night and you should enjoy it, this only comes around once in life." Rick tells her.

"What about your dad? Doing something with detective Beckett?" Alexis didn't want her father to be moping around tonight since it looked like he was really depressed.

"There is no Beckett anymore; she has chosen to join her dead mother instead. I'm not important to her, probably never was." Rick tells her.

"I'm sorry dad; I know what she means to you." Alexis took her dad's arm in her hand.

"I'll get over it. I'll likely drive out to the Hanptons tonight. You and your friends can come up if you like and spend the weekend." Rick offers.

"I'll think about it dad, take care of yourself." Alexis was conflicted. She wanted to stay and help and yet she knew this was a once in a lifetime moment.

Kate was sitting on the swings in a driving rain trying to reach a decision. She had rejected Castle and sent him away in favor of chasing after her mother's case, and all it got her was a beating where her ribs were hurting her and all she wanted was Castle.

Only Castle could make any of this better. Kate had made it past the doorman without any trouble like always. She had been over here so many times before. Kate knew she had pushed him away a little harder this time and it had been a mistake. Now she was hoping that she could fix at least the mess she was in with Castle.

She was unemployed for the first time in years and she had told Castle horrible things. Maybe un-fixable things.

Kate pulled out her phone and scrolled down to Castle's name and pressed call. Only to have it go straight to voice mail. "Yup still mad."

Kate went upstairs anyway. It's harder to ignore a person if it's done in person and Kate had made a choice, just was it too late?

Kate knocked and knocked but no one answered the door, so Kate went down to the garage level and found one of Rick's cars missing. "So he's out somewhere. Guess I wait." And Kate goes back upstairs and sits on the floor with her back up against the door.

Kate was asleep lying on the floor when Martha came home with a drunken Alexis who had a serious hangover.

Kate blinked her eyes open and heard her name being called. "Katherine, what are you doing here?"

"I was, … I was waiting for Castle. Can I talk to him? … I need to tell him something." Kate asks of Martha.

Alexis was just drunk enough to give Beckett a piece of her mind, except the only thing that came out was a moan from the pain.

"Alexis had a little too much party after her graduation." Martha explains and opens the door letting Kate enter.

"You wait right here dear while I find some pain killers." Martha patted Alexis's arm and headed for a bathroom.

"What are you doing here detective Beckett?" Kate could almost see Alexis spit out her name and it hurt. Just that she knew she had it coming.

"I need to apologize to Castle. … I said some mean things in the heat of the moment that I didn't mean to." Kate tells her.

"Dads gone, you drove him away." Alexis informs her.

Kate took it as another stab in the chest. She had made Alexis hate her.

"Do you know where Castle is, I really need to talk to him." Kate needed to fix this mess, starting with Castle.

"Yes." Alexis tells her and it raised Kate's hopes that she could fix this. "And even if dad told me to tell you were he was, I wouldn't." That dagger caused Kate to stop breathing. Alexis didn't just hate her now; it had gone way past that.

"I think you should leave now detective." Alexis really wanted to tell Kate off, just that her head was pounding and even listening to her own voice was painful.

"I'm sorry Alexis, I didn't mean, … I wasn't trying. … Take care of yourself Alexis." Kate managed to make it out the door and close it behind her. Kate made it as far as the front lobby before all that she had done hit her and ended up curled up into herself on the lobby floor sobbing.

**It is now 6 months later:**

Gina had dragged him kicking and screaming back into Yew York to do a number of book signings. He had been happy out in the Hamptons. No Beckett, no body drops, no real distractions. He had even finished the latest Nikki Heat book that was already out on the shelves for less than a week.

It was part of why Gina wanted him back in New York. It was obviously going to be the last Nikki Heat book.

Rick was at his third book store in three days with four more still to come, and his hand was already trying to fall off. He was actually placing ice on it when he got home to the loft.

His mother and Alexis had come out a couple of times, it was on Martha's first visit that Rick had found out that Kate had been sitting outside of his door waiting to talk to him.

"You should call her dear, you two really should learn how to talk to each other." Martha just didn't see the need to keep tip toeing around everything. If Katherine was interested her son might as well find out now, instead of prolonging the agony.

"It doesn't matter anymore mother, Kate has made her choice. It was likely the only choice she was ever going to make." Rick tells her.

Martha knew what that meant. Richard had tried and been shot down by Katherine. "I'm sorry kiddo, but would you rather find out now instead of chasing her around for another couple of years?

I had such high hopes for you two." Martha liked Katherine a lot more than Meredith or Gina.

"She was never going to love me mother. I'm just going to spend some time out here and get over her and move on, … somehow." Rick tells her, sighing since his heart was still hoping Kate would come around.

"You'll find someone dear; there are lots of fish in the sea." Martha left him to work it out for himself.

Now he was sitting on yet another hard on his ass chair, praying his hand would fall off so he could stop. "Who do I make it out to?" Rick asks yet again, like a broken record. Broken record, just remembering that, that was even possible suddenly had him thinking of his age.

'I'm not that old damn it'

"Kate, … You can make it out to Kate." Is the voice he hears and looks up to see her.

Kate didn't look that much different. Maybe her eyes were a little red and her eyes were a little baggy, likely from lack of sleep, and her clothes were simple.

'To Kate, Richard Castle.'

Rick handed back her copy of DEAD HEAT, and moved on to the next person. It hadn't been out long so Kate hadn't read it yet to know that Nikki was dead.

Gina had finally released him so he could go home. He suffered through shaking hands with some of the book store staff, which only put more focus on the pain his hand was in, and went out the front door.

Rick started walking for the corner to spy the first cab that came along. "Castle wait." It got Rick to freeze. 'God she had waited to talk to him!' Rick moaned internally.

Might as well get it over with. "What do you want Detective Beckett?" Kate couldn't help but miss the venom in his voice, and she knew she deserved it.

Kate skips the part about not being a detective anymore. "I wanted to talk Castle and say that I was sorry." Kate doesn't look him in the eye; in fact she is more looking at the sidewalk than anything.

"You made yourself quite clear detective. There is no room in your life for anyone except your quest for your mother's killer.

I scratched and clawed for years to even make a dent in your walls and get you to see that there was more to life than your dead mother." Rick was still mad.

However Kate's defenses suddenly went up at the mention of her mother's case. "That's not fair Castle."

"Not fair!? … Not fair is using your dead mother to hide behind. Your walls are keeping everyone out alright; just what you haven't noticed is that you've trapped yourself behind them.

Even if you solve your mother's case, then what? No one can just flip a switch and turn themselves into someone else. You aren't suddenly going to love someone simply because who killed your mother is behind bars.

You're going to be 60 when you figure out you threw away your life all for your quest to find your mother's killer and that's all you'll have to hold onto. That and your what if's and if only's.

It took me 6 months in the Hamptons to finally figure out that you were never going to love me or anyone else, even after you solved your mother's case. You'll have had your walls for so long that they are all you know. Now you'll just hide behind them and let the world pass you by.

Have a nice life Beckett." And Rick strides off in search of that taxi so he can go home and then back out to the Hamptons.

It left Kate standing there staring at him and at where he used to be. "But I love you." Kate whispers out finally.

"He hates me dad." Kate tells her father as she plops down on his sofa.

Kate had moved in with her father right after her fiasco with Martha and Alexis in order to save money and try to figure out what to do next.

"Katie you know that everytime that someone gets close you end the relationship. Have you ever wondered why that is.

Rick is a good man Katie, but even he has his limits. A person can only put their lives on hold for someone who doesn't even show any interest in them. Did you ever even tell him, 'I love you, please wait for me."?

Kate shakes her head. "I pushed him away. … But he always came back dad, … always."

"Do you love him Katie? … And I don't mean love him but your mother's case is more important. Do you love him above any other thing in your life. That is the kind of love your mother and I had. She was the first person in my life. Meant more to me than anything. I'd live in a cardboard box in some alley if I had her. That kind of priority.

Do you love him like that Katie?" Jim asks Kate.

When he didn't get an answer. "Now you know why he didn't come back this time when you pushed. He figured out he was never going to be first in your life. Maybe not even after your mother's case." Jim was sorry for his daughter. She was too stubborn for her own good.

"Lanie told me he wasn't going to wait forever. … I just didn't listen." Kate bent forward and placed her head in her hands.

"If you want him you're going to have to fight for him this time. You're going to have to be the one who comes back after you pushed him away." Jim tells Kate and stands up and kisses her head and walks into the kitchen.

"He doesn't answer my phone calls or text messages. Alexis slams the door in my face. Even Martha barely talks to me." Kate moans. How is she supposed to fix this if she can't find him and talk to him?

Jim kept his mouth shut. Talking to Katie had never gotten him anywhere in the past. If Katie didn't figure it out for herself, …

**It is now one year later:**

Kate decided that she needed to get out. As much as she loved her father, living with him was getting on her nerves, so she was out for a run in the park.

Kate had already finished about 3 miles when someone caught her attention. "CASTLE!?" Kate stopped in front of him.

"Detective Beckett." Rick offered, this time without the venom in his voice that she had heard last time. Only this time it had been replaced with indifference to her even standing there.

Kate sat down next to him, even if that was a bad idea, without a cool down period. "How have you been Castle, and it's not detective anymore." Kate tells him.

"OH!?" Rick turns his head to look at her.

"I resigned about 1-1/2 years ago. Right after our fight actually." Kate explains.

"That's your choice Beckett." Rick didn't care anymore.

"I'm sorry Castle. I should never have pushed you away. It's just that I fell down that rabbit hole of my mother's case again and I couldn't see anything else again." Kate tried to explain.

"Your mother's case always was more important to you than anything else, or anyone else." Rick tells her and looks away.

"Not anymore, things have changed Castle. … I'm working part-time at Macy's while I go to school. Not many of my courses at Stanford transferred after all this time, but I'm back in law school again." Kate tells him. It was the only life she still had, with her old dream.

"Maybe, … **ELL BE CAREFUL!"** Rick suddenly yelled out.

That got Kate to turn her head to look where Rick was looking. Across the way was a playgound set with a few children playing. When suddenly one of them shot away and started running for them.

She was cute with long brown hair flying everywhere. "Did you see me daddy?" The little girl asks after she slams into Rick.

"I saw, you are very good. You're going to win a gold medal in the Olympics one day." Rick lifts her up and kisses her head several times getting the girl to giggle and try and get away.

"This is Ell, my daughter. Ell this is an old friend from long ago, her name is Kate." Rick tells her.

"Hi." Ell looks at Kate just a little shyly.

"Hi Ell, it's good to meet you." Kate tells her and places a fake smile on her face.

"Are we going to go see mommy now?" Ell asks Rick, since she wanted to leave.

Rick looked at his watch. "Your mother should be just about done by now."

"Her mother?" Kate asks, still tying to digest the word daughter.

"Sam, short for Samantha. Ell is her daughter from a previous marriage. We've been married just short of 2 months now." Rick explains.

"We need to go daddy!" Ell wanted to get to her mother.

"We should go." Rick stood up and took Ell's hand.

"Maybe I'll see you around Castle." Kate offers, since she didn't see Espo or Ryan anymore. Even Lanie was only seen about once or twice a month now.

"Perhaps, but not likely. Sam accepted a position with her company in the San Francisco office. We're moving there next month. Which actually puts me closer to Alexis since she is at Stanford." Rick explains.

"Mommy says we're going to live on a beach." Ell speaks up since she had seen the house they had already bought earlier.

"That's right munchkin, you're going to be a California beach girl." Rick ruffles her hair, getting Ell to complain. "DADDY!?"

"Have a nice life Beckett." And Rick walks away with Ell's hand in his. Rick was over Kate Beckett.

Kate watched them walk away and worked at blinking back tears. She really had pushed too hard this time. Pushed Castle straight into another woman's arms. "But I love you." Kate whispered to herself.

Royce had been right, it had been the hard part, and all she had left was the 'What If's"

They really were over. There wasn't going to be any US. It really was, …

**THE END**


End file.
